Today is Thanksgiving and I am not spending it with my family because my parents went to Winnipeg and my brother is with his girlfriend’s family. In the past, when this has happened, I would have been alone on the couch, in my sweats eating take-out all weekend. Instead I am going to a friendsgiving dinner just four floors down from my apartment with a group of wonderful friends from work and friends I have met through them. And the last two nights I have got to spend with my improv family, doing sketch shows, improv sets and just being lucky enough to be in their company.
Last night in the glow of getting to play in my first Armando with people I have been huge fans of and getting to chill with them after, I remembered the sad lonely person I used to be just a few years ago. I was living on survive, I was heartbroken and beaten down by a lifetime of rejection… I felt hopeless and alone. I was in a very dark place for a very long time and after some self work and travel I was fighting my way back to the light. Then I connected with a guy and it was a tumultuous and I got my heart broken once again and I could have gone down the old hide away and wallow path. But for some reason, maybe just out of pure boredom of living my life on survive, I made different choices. I went to shows alone, I said yes to making new friends and I pursued something that I used to love and left behind (improv). Those choices made a world of difference in my life.
After a lifetime of being an outsider and insecure victim of bullying, I am finally finding my own voice and I have found people who support and love me for it. Life is far from perfect but today I am thankful for exactly where I am. I have always been blessed with a wonderful family but now I have a community of friends that I never thought I would ever be a part of. You have all helped me find a fire in my soul and joy in my heart that I never knew existed and for that I am eternally grateful.